Sky Gaze Fam

It's not a new idea that the enemy doesn't present himself in his true form. It wouldn't be very hard to resist a the common illustration of a horned demon with red skin and obvious ill intent. The Bible says to resist the devil, which makes it clear that he reveals himself in cunning desirable ways. It also says resist him and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Unfortunately it is appealing to have our own desires met. When we are in the habit of seeking our own satisfaction the traps become much more alluring. But when we see his charm as as cheap as a grinning wall flower that wets two fingers to sleek down his eyes brows followed by an overly confident point accompanied by a wink, he loses all power when we laugh in his face and go about our fathers business. When our desires line up with that of the Lord's he satisfies us. When we satisfy ourselves with temporary glorification we remain unfulfilled. The devil is as emba...

I'll be the first one to admit. I'm a cryer. When I see something beautiful or get overwhelmed with compassion I turn into a leaky faucet and for me it can be just as annoying as the tormenting drip that has the ability to make itself known from across an entire house. I can turn my head just enough to avoid revealing my uncontrollable wimpiness or try to wipe away a rogue tear before I'm found out, but it is to no avail. I don't mean to be so sensitive, especially because in my own life and in dealing with the weight of my own circumstances I can certainly refrain from turning into a blubbering mess. What can I say? I'm a sucker for love. The times though that I have cried and even ugly cried have been for men and for loss. On one hand I can be provoked by the budding hope of a future and on the other am very affected by what seems to be the loss of it. The mature me looks and heartbreak as a learning experience that proves that hope can only be safe whe...

Missionaries are servants, not bosses. Dr. Frank Rosser (see the article:  The Greatest is Servant of All ) The last few months have been like a state of sleep. I closed my eyes mid-August and am now waking up again. There was a break somewhere in that time (October), but I'm not sure what happened in it. I think there was a camping trip. When you are asleep, you do not take stock of your circumstance for the day. You recuperate. That's what you do in sleep. Today, I feel somewhat awake, so I'll take stock: I'm about 210 pounds I'm having about as difficult time as I can remember at work. We are preparing our house for selling. I'm working on finishing SeedProjx: Backyard Botany (which I think has a lot to be desired) I'm in kind of an in-between churches state I find that somehow, though I have gentlemen that I can reach out to, I'm not in regular communion with anyone other than my wife. As I look for a common theme of the above bulle...

                                        These are some quotes I snatched: These 2 from Old Man and the Sea It is better to be lucky, but I would rather be exact. Then, when you are lucky you are ready. Exacting if less exact. This from Wendell Berry's Men and Women in Search of Common Ground The danger in the phrase "common ground" is that it is likely to be meant as no more than a metaphor... if we use the term only as a metaphor, then our thinking will not be robustly circumstantial and historical, as it needs to be, but only a weak, clear broth of ideas and feelings. https://www.sunstonemagazine.com/pdf/060-08-12.pdf

Went to sleep last night in silence with Jess. Went to sleep feeling hurt... again. But if I am reflective I can observe how my sensitivities combined with my approach make for a defensive or aggressive posture on the part of others. Adding in that she has a general inability to communicate in a "soft word", it makes for the perfect recipe of dis-ease. I'm really enjoying the Wendell Berry book that Jamin lent me. I pulled 3 passages from the  Two Economies essay: A similar purpose was served by the institution of the Sabbath, when, by not working, the Israelites were meant to see the limited efficacy of their work and thus to understand their dependence. This above hit me, because I often think about Sabbath and rest in terms of restoration, but not in terms of our finitude. As limited beings, we need to "plug into" the Source. That is, if we are ever to arrive at our true capabilities, our capacity (which in Christ is pretty far out there!) He is pre...

Yesterday Jess and I talked about our church. She told me that in the next few weeks she was going to visit Memphis Tabernacle down the road. The part she needed our church to be, in sermons, in actuality, was just a small slice of what it actually was. I reminded her of the friendships she had at the church, to which she responded, "not enough". There was a moment during the sermon where I understood what my wife was talking about. At the end. To finish and send us off, the pastor asked us, "do you have a God who is big enough to be with you in the prison seasons?" And that's where he left it. I thought an emphatic "YES!" would have made all of the difference. Right now I'm listening to Tony Dungy's Mentor Leadership and I'm nearing the end in Methods, for which he has 7 E's to describe. Dungy is most emphatic that encouragement is a non-negotiable for the mentor leader. I really like the quote he uses to open up the section as w...

Yesterday I was irritable at times, conflicted. I wanted to spend less time on the road, more time hanging out with friends. I wanted to Jess to come home so that I didn't have to watch Sadie alone. I wanted to go in and watch Disney shorts with Jess and Sadie, but instead I worked. With each venture, there was pressure from something else pushing on the thing that I was doing at the time. Friend time was pushing in on driving time, Jess not being home was pushing in on family time, work was pushing in on family time. Here's the thing. Jess got to go to Arlington to check about a muraling job. We got to spend time with our worship team friends and eat amazing food with Sadie in attendance. Jess got to get a haircut, and I got to spend some one-on-one time with Sadie, where I learned that some of the things that we do in one-on-one time she remembers, and likes to do with just daddy. I got a chance to complete some work so that it's not put off and overwhelming the next ...